Guilt
by Drarry97
Summary: Lucas and Riley have a fight. Farkle makes sure she is ok. Warning: Cheating. Kinda plotless.
1. Farkle

**Hey guys! I feel like I've been living under a rock these past few years. I used to watch Boy Meets World religiously and yet had no idea there was a Girl Meets World until I came across it on Netflix! So I watched it and I think most of us can agree that Riley and Lucas should not have ended up together. So I came up with this little fic that I hope you enjoy. I doubt it will be anything other than a one shot.**

 ***Warning* Unfaithful partners in this**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Girl Meets World**

The stars in my planetarium ceiling were unnaturally bright tonight, but I suppose that could have something to do with the alcohol that I had consumed earlier or maybe it has something to do with the brunette that was passed out on my chest, our naked bodies still pressed together as I traced random designs on her silky smooth back. I hadn't drank as much alcohol as she did, which is why I'm the one still awake watching the ceiling and trying not to be crushed under the weight of the guilt that I felt, and knowing that if she hadn't been so far gone she would be feeling as guilty or more guilty than I do.

It's amazing how you can sober up as you move with someone in an intimate dance that should not be done between two people who have a significant other. The party had been loud with intoxicated bodies all pressing in on each other while they danced to the music and drank their alcohol to celebrate the end of exams before Christmas break. I went to the party with Isadora who decided to indulge in alcohol for the first time in the name of science so that she could witness firsthand the effects in which it alters the brain. It had been her own idea that I join her in this experiment which ended after a few hours with her grabbing my best friends, Lucas's, face and planting a sloppy kiss on his lips. I had been drinking, as per her wishes, so as a scientist I had been interested in that particular effect; however, as her boyfriend I had demanded to know why she had done that.

I watched as Riley walked up to Lucas unsteadily on feet that were barely holding her up, her eyes barely aware but still filled with hurt and her voice slurring a lot as she asked Lucas why he would kiss someone who isn't her, his girlfriend. Isadora just laughed at me and told me that I was overreacting to something that is completely natural, which I suppose it was for someone who had her inhibitions lowered with all of the alcohol she had consumed in the time the party has lasted. Plus, I couldn't say that I was all that surprised considering the fact that she had been making eyes at Lucas for years without me bothering the say anything. I did find it surprising when Riley and Lucas began to shout right there in the middle of the dance floor, ending with Lucas telling Riley to just go before wrapping his arms around Smackle and pulling her lips back to his as I watched Riley leave in tears obviously much more hurt over the betrayal of her boyfriend than I felt over the betrayal of my own girlfriend.

The party was in a bit of a shady area so I hadn't liked the idea of her going home on her own, Maya hadn't come to the party opting instead to spend the night with her own boyfriend, Josh. Riley's parents weren't expecting her home since they thought she was spending the night with Maya because Riley had known they would kill her for being drunk. I'm not exactly sure where she had been planning on going after the party but I had a feeling that her plans had been ruined by that spectacle so when I caught up with her at the door I was pleased to walk with her to the subway and make sure that she got home safely.

We had been leaning pretty heavily against each other and stumbling while boarding, falling heavily onto the seats closest to the doors. Riley still had tears falling from her eyes which was noticed by a few people on the subway and they spent the remainder of the ride trying to cheer her up and get her to laugh. By the time we reached my stop, she was in a happy enough mood still laughing over some joke that, since we had been drinking so heavily was much funnier than it should have been. I didn't stop her when she followed me off the subway and to my empty apartment, my parents at a conference in France that weekend meaning that nobody would catch us being drunk. We spent the way up to my apartment bursting out into random bursts of laughter over nothing while we both tried to make sense over the fact that watching a light flicker in the elevator was not funny, although it kept setting us off anyway.

As we made our way up to my apartment with her leaning on me a bit more heavily than me leaning on her, I brought her to my bedroom, still laughing over nothing. I noticed when her eyes went up to my ceiling and looked around for what I knew was Pluto. In hindsight, it was my own fault we are in this situation now. I walked us into the center of my room and moved so that I was standing behind her. I was all but pushed up against her, leaving one of my hands on her hip to keep her balanced before moving my other hand down to grab hers moving her hand up so that she was pointing at a particular bright light and leaning forward a little bit more to whisper in her ear, "Pluto." Her shiver was my second mistake that night as my alcohol soaked brain told me she was cold so I let go of her hand to wrap my arm around her waist and pull her flush against myself. My other arm was reaching to do the same when she turned around, the joy from the subway still slightly on her face as her eyes met mine.

Alcohol is of course, a bad idea in the best of times. However, drinking alcohol and running off with a girl who is not my girlfriend was a big mistake. I felt as if every nerve in my body had caught fire in that instant, and I'm not entirely sure how come I felt as if she could extinguish the flames just by being near me. It is a scientific impossibility for sure and yet at the time I couldn't make my mind come up with a different thought process.

I don't actually remember much after that but she was looking at me and I could see the exact moment her eyes seemed to darken. I'm not sure if it was me or her that moved first, but we were kissing and by the time my hazy brain cleared a bit, she was wrapped around me naked and laying her head into my chest with a soft "night." I stared at the ceiling and watched the bright stars and wondered if we were the only ones who deserve this guilt or if we weren't the only ones who acted in betrayal. My last thoughts, as I drifted to sleep is what was going to happen the next day.

 **Alright! I hope you enjoyed that. Please review and tell me what you thought!**


	2. Lucas

**Alright so I guess I did have a little more to say on the matter. Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Girl Meets World**

Alcohol is not my friend. In one night I had lost my girlfriend and now everything is pretty awkward with my best friend, Farkle. It had been Maya's idea to go to the party, so we had all made plans to stay out for the night and for once let loose. Riley had been looking forward to it more than any of us I think. But last minute, Josh decided that he wanted to spend the night at the dorm so after mentioning to Maya that he would be alone with his homework for the night she decided that he could use her company.

So Farkle, Isadora, Riley and me all went to the party where we were immediately given alcohol which we drank down. Riley wasn't too big of a fan of the taste, however some girls heard her complaining and showed her how to mix her own drinks which lead Riley to drinking a lot. I stuck to what I was given although I did feel a little abandoned over the fact that my girlfriend didn't want to hang out with me at a party that her and her best friend had planned on dragging me to. I never did paid attention to what the others were drinking however, I did notice that as time went on Smackle was getting closer to me. The music had been loud and a little overwhelming but Isadora was a bit of a solid presence by my side so when I felt her hands on my face pulling me down, I didn't fight it. I actually welcomed the feeling of her lips on mine and the taste of her tongue as it tangled with my own.

The yelling form of my girlfriend Riley forced me to come back down to earth from whatever cloud I had been soaring on during that drunken kiss with my best friend's girlfriend which made me feel a little irritated. The sound of laughter filled my ears as I stared at Riley who looked unsteady and pitiful with tears pouring down her cheeks. I was feeling pretty resentful toward her as I told her that I wasn't doing anything wrong, I was just enjoying the party like she had told me to and if she didn't like that then she could leave. It was stupid of me to pull Smackle back towards me, but she was pressed up against me and it was a pretty intense feeling when you're drunk for basically the first time in your life. I didn't watch the girl I claimed to love leave, nor did I see the guy I considered my best friend go after her.

I stayed with Isadora for the rest of the night kissing, dancing and drinking having a great night which ended with us making out in a bed upstairs and passing out before any clothes could be shed. The next morning loomed over us much faster that I would have liked and the brunette in my bed was not the same one that I had gotten used to in the past. The night before took it time trickling into my brain but when it came I was up and calling Riley which ended in a voicemail each time I tried. Smackle stirred on the bed and I turned to see her watching me calmly which confused me over how she wasn't upset over what Farkle could have thought of last night. I walked her home feeling awful about the whole night that had just passed and I guess she had noticed because instead of thanking me, her good bye consisted of "don't flatter yourself into thinking this is going to change anything between us, Lucas. My inhibitions were lowered last night by the indulgence of alcohol which resulted in me kissing you and agreeing to continue the night in your company." Then she turned and walked into her house without a second glance.

It wasn't until I arrived at her window later that day that I found her sitting in her window staring into her room with a semi blank expression. At first I had panicked thinking it was about me but I didn't have to wait long to find out her troubles. She looked at me and there were no tears in her eyes but they were wide and she looked like she had seen hell but it wasn't until she spoke that I saw it too. "I slept with Farkle last night. I am so sorry Lucas." Then she looked back into her room and went silent.

Processing those words had been hard but I needed her to know that I was still there for her, "I….. could forgive a onetime thing Riley, I love you." She had looked at me again and her expression hadn't changed one bit.

"Did you sleep with Smackle?" Her eyes had bore into mine looking for an answer that I couldn't give her. I couldn't really form words with her looking at me the way she had been so I only shook my head. Her expression softened just a bit as she gave me a small smile and spoke as she turned away, "There is nothing to forgive. I don't deserve it and you don't deserve to be with a cheater. Good bye Lucas."

It was one of the most stupid things that I had ever done, but I left. I climbed out of her window and decided that she could use the break to calm down and relax. However, when school started back up again she wouldn't talk to me. She was hardly talking to anybody other than Maya and she was avoiding Farkle like the plague. One month later, Riley started to take a lot of tests through the office and I learned from Maya that she was trying to get an early graduation so she could go off to college a year early. She left before the end of March, somewhere in California I hear and I remember thinking, why does she have to go across the country?

Riley had been my perfect girlfriend. Then one night at a stupid party our junior year had ruined that and I still don't know where I stand with my best friend because we hardly ever talk anymore. I'm sitting in my cap and gown, listening to our valedictorian speak about what our future brings while I think about the past and the little ball of sunshine that had changed my life.

 **So let me know what you think! I am thinking about writing one for Riley as well, but I don't think I can write one for Smackle.**


	3. Riley

**Well, here it is. Definitely the last chapter to this fic. The Riley chapter that I promised.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Girl Meets World**

Waking up in the arms of the man who isn't your boyfriend is pretty awkward. Waking up naked in the arms of one of your best friends who just so happened to be dating a friend of yours has to be one of the most horrifyingly awkward moments of my life. I had carefully extracted myself from him and had been in the process of looking for my clothes when the headache had occurred to me which led me to thinking about the night before. Maya had told me once that if you drink enough alcohol then the next morning you wouldn't actually remember your night of drinking but I know now that had been a lie. I had drank so much and yet I remembered almost every detail about what had happened at that party and after it.

I was dressed and just about to leave when he woke up, those bright blue eyes looking at me in my slightly rumpled clothing and I told him a hasty goodbye, avoiding eye contact with him. When I arrived home, I took a shower and felt my break down coming on so I stayed in there longer than I had to and let myself cry. I remember thinking about how I now had no reason at all to be upset with Lucas for kissing Smackle, especially since I had actually had sex with Farkle. I had slept with Lucas a few times in the 3 years we had dated but I could count that amount on one hand, the last time actually being some five months beforehand, so the fact that drunk me had wanted to have sex still surprises me. By the time I had left the shower I had prunes everywhere and the water had felt freezing to my skin.

Arriving to my room, I sat at my bay window and thought about how much I had messed up. By the time Lucas had showed up, my tears had faded into nonexistence and I was just feeling so numb. I broke up with Lucas because of what I had done with Farkle but I can't really remember the conversation we had now. I knew that I couldn't deal with anyone at that point in time so I had shut my window and spent a quiet Christmas break barely even talking to Maya who was the only one who really could get me to talk but I was ashamed so I told her Lucas and I had broken up but I didn't tell her why.

It was the day before we were due back to school that the knock I had been expecting came at my window. Looking over, I was unsurprised to see those blue eyes that seemed as if they could look right through me. When I let him in and stood in his presence for the first time since the night of the party my senses seemed to go into overdrive as I remembered the feel of his lips on mine and the taste of his tongue, even the feel of his hands as they touched me in places that I never really felt comfortable with Lucas touching even though I had been so happy with him.

"We need to talk Riley." Farkles voice had been so calm and serious and the goosebumps that erupted into my skin over his quiet tone had had nothing to do with remembering that night and the soft words he had spoken on our way to his house to try and cheer me up over watching my boyfriend kissing his girlfriend.

"There is nothing to talking about Farkle. What we did was in the past and there is nothing that will be able to change that." I turned away from him, I found it easier to talk to him when I was looking out my window and not looking at those blue eyes that used to be so open and yet I now found that I couldn't read them.

"I know you broke up with Lucas. He came to talk to me. I told Isadora what happened and she wasn't too happy to know what we did. She said that it's a step back in our relationship but since we were technically working in an experimental situation then she can't actually stay mad at me for us having slept together. I love my girlfriend Riley, and I'm sorry but I'm not planning on leaving her to be with you. I know that it's harsh to say but I only love you as a friend so it wouldn't be right to either one of us to try to force a relationship. It won't take long before we are both at college anyway and maybe in the future we could have a relationship but as of right now, I choose my girlfriend. I'm sorry." I could have believed him if his voice had stayed calm and quiet. I ignored the way his eyes were watering and the way that he looked as desperate as he had sounded when his voice had risen and almost cracked in a lot of areas because I had known that I didn't matter anymore.

I had looked at him and gave a dry laugh, "Farkle, I don't want a relationship with you. I broke up with Lucas because what I did to him was wrong and I don't want him to forgive me for something that shouldn't have any acceptance. I'm not asking you to break up with Smackle to be with me and I don't expect anything to change between us, what we did Farkle, it was a mistake." I didn't look at him when I said that although I did mean it but I couldn't stand the bad taste in my mouth when I thought about how it hadn't felt like a mistake but of course it was. It had to be.

I saw his mouth open again and I watched his face softening into that look that everyone got when they were going to apologize for something but I hadn't wanted his apology, I wanted him to stay firm in the way he had just been. Even if he hadn't sounded firm, his words had been but I had known if he started talking again I would probably accept it but I couldn't , not then and definetly not now.

"I'm tired Farkle. We can talk more about this later but I want you to go now." I walked over to the window and waited for him to leave.

The look on his face made me believe for one wild minute as he approached me that he was going to kiss me but he just pulled me into a hug and whispered "we will always be friends Riles." Before he climbed out of the window and disappeared into the night.

I remember crying myself to sleep that night, not getting to sleep until the early hours of the morning and arriving to school pale and drowsy. I didn't talk to Lucas or Farkle and I avoided Smackle's eyes whenever we met in class or the hallways. It was a few weeks later and I had been focusing so hard on my studies when I had been contacted by a spokesperson for a college that I had called in happier times in California to find out if there was a possibility of getting a scholarship. She told me about certain tests I could take in order to graduate early and get a head start on my education with not only a scholarship but since my grades were in such great standing, I could leave a few months early this year. At first I declined the offer and put the phone number she had left with me away into my bedside drawer taking it out less than a week later when I realized that it was in my best interest since I couldn't stay here, I hardly got along with my best friend anymore and I had ruined everything else with my other friends.

Looking back, the funny thing is that Lucas had been basically my first everything. He had been the first boy I had a crush on, my first official kiss, my first reason for jealousy, my first love and we held each other's virginity. When we had been together I had been so happy, and yet it wasn't until the night of that party that I had understood what fire in a relationship actually meant. Being with Farkle had been like dancing in a fire that disguised itself as rain. Lucas had never made me feel so alive just by looking at me, he had never made me feel breathless just by touching me, he had never made me forget my own name or make common sense fly out the window by pulling me flush against his body and he had never made me feel so completely safe as to take control over what we were doing as I pushed Farkle down and climbed on top of him. Everything about that night had been so amazing and the worst part was that I still wake up after dreams of the night when I had been with my best friend even though it had been the night that I had been completely unfaithful to my boyfriend whom I had claimed to love.

I take college classes in California now and live on my own in a dorm room, nobody back home knows the exact reason why I had left. But that answer is so simple. Less than a week after I had spoken to Mrs. Murphy, the spokesperson for the college, I had taken a test and looked down at those two pink lines that seemed brighter than the eyes of the father of my future child.

 **So let me know what you thought! Ever since I wrote that first chapter, I had been playing with how Riley would have felt. I know it's a touch dramatic to make her run off but let's face it, that show was pretty dramatic. Let me know if you are interested in a sequel or anything of that nature.**


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